Why Ed was right to stay out of Dave’s bed


11:50 am - January 25th 2013

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by Giselle Green

Tory euro sceptics must be wandering around Westminster this week with that post-tantric glow. “It was worth the wait” gasped Douglas Carswell. “We’re all in this [bed?] together!” tweeted rebel MP Mark Pritchard, presumably with Dave lying next to him.

But they probably should have opened the blinds before taking leave of their lover, because in the cold light of day they would have seen a whole pile of shagged-out bodies.

How dastardly Dave thought he could get away with such scurrilous behaviour is beyond me. But for some inexplicable reason everyone in the deficit-sized bed decided they’d just turn a blind eye to his infidelity and claim he was their man. But for how long will Dave’s lovers carry on the charade?

Cameron’s former speech writer Ian Birrell said his ex-boss’s words “could have been reduced to a couple of lines on the referendum emailed out to newsrooms; the rest is padding wrapped around a stick of political dynamite”. How long before that stick of dynamite starts fizzing?

During the short gap between ‘that speech’ and PMQs , there were feverish suggestions that Ed Miliband should perform his own E U-turn and jump into bed with Dave, with a promise to hold his own referendum, possibly at the same time as the general election.

I’m delighted he clearly read my tweet hashtagged #eddontcave.

Europe barely registers as an issue with voters and latest polls show that most people would vote to stay IN Europe, even without a renegotiated treaty. I think the public will applaud Ed for not being bounced into an overtly opportunistic move by a Prime Minister clearly acting out of party political expediency rather than national interests.

We already have a referendum enshrined in law if we are asked to cede more powers to Europe. Why on earth do we need a referendum if powers flow in the opposite direction?

Rather than waste his time banging on about Europe (like the Prime Minister claimed he wouldn’t) Ed should focus on fixing the economy – or on convincing voters his party can fix the economy.

He was given a helping hand this week by the IMF which criticised the government’s austerity measures. Presumably Dave was too busy day dreaming about his tantric exploits to care.


Giselle Green ran Siobhan Benita’s media campaign in the London Mayoral election

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Reader comments


1. Shatterface

Tory euro sceptics must be wandering around Westminster this week with that post-tantric glow. “It was worth the wait” gasped Douglas Carswell. “We’re all in this [bed?] together!” tweeted rebel MP Mark Pritchard, presumably with Dave lying next to him.

But they probably should have opened the blinds before taking leave of their lover, because in the cold light of day they would have seen a whole pile of shagged-out bodies.

I think you just beat the site’s previous record for homophobic innuendo..

‘We already have a referendum enshrined in law if we are asked to cede more powers to Europe. Why on earth do we need a referendum if powers flow in the opposite direction?’

Because the British public, frequently, mercilessly demand the option of exiting. They’re sick and tired of being denied the right to give their democratic consent on this issue, and the option of full withdrawl from the union must be on the table. Personally, even as a firm supporter of continued membership, I can’t find fault or argument with the decision to offer an In/Out referendum.

@ 2 by “British Public” I suppose you mean those members of the British public the Barclay brothers, Lord Norcliffe, and Rupert Murdoch whose organs (phwoor) constantly demand exit in order to bolster their own financial interests.

I have never, ever heard a non-media-empire-owning member of the British public ever demand a referendum. I’ve heard them argue that Spurs should get sack David Levi, they didn’t think much of the latest X Factor winner, or that their worried about getting little Hildegard into their choice secondary, but Europe mainly comes up with regard to camping and beach holidays.

But then I don’t mix with media tycoons or Tory MPs.

@3

The Peoples Pledge?

Why do diehard supporters of the union have such profound contempt for the views of the electorate? If you truly believe in continued membership, as I do, than fight for it at the polls, justify what it is the EU offers us and why we should remain a strong, involved member.

There’s nothing to fear if you have courage in the strengths of your arguments.

5. Richard Carey

@ 4 DavidC,

“Why do diehard supporters of the union have such profound contempt for the views of the electorate?”

I reckon because it makes them feel like they’re part of the intelligent few.

No poll boost thus far.

Huge europhobe ejaculation on wednesday but a shrug of the shoulders from ordinary British people.

We don’t know what the terms the Tories want for the EU so we can’t judge Cameron’s success – or more likely total failure – to get what he and the small clique of eurosceptics want.

It’s a farce. And the British people have seen right through it.

Funny as hell.

7. Chaise Guevara

@ 1

“I think you just beat the site’s previous record for homophobic innuendo.”

Not to mention over-stretched metaphor.

8. Shatterface

Not to mention over-stretched metaphor.

She even had to add ‘bed?’ in parenthesis to even start the metaphor because ‘we are all in this together’ has no sexual connotations whatsoever: Freud’s Vienna circle and the entire cast of Up Pompeii couldn’t read a double entendre into this.

This is ugly Jan Moir-level stuff.

@8

This is ugly Jan Moir-level stuff.

You should read some gay blogs then, if you think that.

A regular critique of the anti-gay squad there is often, after watching a clip of their ranting, “I couldn’t concentrate on what his was saying for all the purses and matching heels that spilled out of his mouth.” due to the fact they often sound gay and have massive gay-face.
Still, us queers are quite happy for you to take offense on our behalf.

“If you truly believe in continued membership, as I do, than fight for it at the polls,”

Normally of course this will be done by putting it in your manifesto. We accept this in relation to every other policy issue. Oddly enough I’ve never heard anyone complain about the decision to stay out of the euro without holding a referendum on the subject. Pro-withdrawal parties secured 5% last time out. I’m pleasantly surprised that EM has not jumped on this bandwagon.


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